I am waiting in eager anticipation for next week to hear an update on our trip. I have wavered over the past month between what feels like patient trust and angsty confusion.

Confused of this limbo-like period of waiting, confused if I should press into action or stillness.  I sit in these snowballing questions and become overwhelmed. Ignoring my doubts so these mounting feelings of not-enough will go away.

Patient by delighting in the Lord's character. He is good and trustworthy, He sees me and knows me, He has plans for me. He is Love and loves me so much that he sent his Son to die for me. He saved me; I can be patient in the waiting.

I think about Joseph who waited in prison for ten years to even have a conversation with the Pharaoh. And David who was running and hiding for years to avoid being killed by Saul. In their long waiting periods they never wavered in their faith that the Lord would fulfill His promises.

How I long to be unwavering.

I have learned to press into the waiting.  To enjoy the Lord in this unique season. I am learning how to be thankful when I don’t feel like it. Learning how to take my gaze up to see His beauty in creation and grace that is lavished on me when I don't deserve it. These delightful moments are gone as quickly as they come, but moments of joy in God's Presence gives me life and hope.

I look forward to sharing an update on the trip soon. Please join me in praying that God's will would be done, that no matter what this season looks like, the ends of the earth would hear the Gospel.