My time fundraising so far feels so vulnerable, like I am getting open-heart surgery and everyone is watching.  I am opening myself up to criticism and failure and loss so I can follow the Lord into the unknown. 

"…"If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will find it" (Matthew 16:24-25)

I am praying that my faith would be bigger than my fear. I am praying that I would not rely on what I see around me in the world, or what I can reason, but on God's promises to love me, be with me, go before me and hold my hand.

I am praying that I would decide everyday to choose the Lord. To surrender what I see and what I reason so I may be able to see the Lord moving and working.

I am not following Jesus because its reasonable, I follow Him because He is Worthy.

There was a time this month when I thought I was quitting. Leaving, postponing, saying 'no' to God. He would still love me if I said 'no". It does not make sense to go now.

"You know you'll get sick if you go, right?"

"Don't you understand what is going on in the world?"

"Now is the worst time to travel."

It's been easy for me become defensive as I wonder at God's timing. I have been wisely reminded that it is not my job to defend the Lord or His timing.

It is my job to obey Him.

God has been so, so faithful during this past month. I feel known and celebrated when I take even little steps of progress. He is so Good, He is moving so powerfully!

I have loved connecting with old and new friends. I have loved hearing updates and stories of what everyone is up to, how everyone is managing, learning and resting during this strange time.

I am eager to continue praying, learning and growing. Don't hesitate to reach out and send prayer requests my way!